half way there

We have finally reached that momentous milestone in our pregnancy where we go in for the anatomy scan ultrasound also known as the one where the gender is revealed.  Let me just say that the decision to not find out the sex of the baby was probably one of the hardest that I had to make, and it surprised me.  But, it certainly keeps the excitement of the pregnancy going until the very end.  It was a last minute decision, because in my mind, until it is too late, we can always change our minds.

The night before, I was a bundle of nerves.  I couldn't think about anything else.  I couldn't sleep.  I kept counting the hours and minutes until the morning appointment.  At 5:30 am the day of, I realized that Joe was also in the same boat because we were both up and couldn't get back to sleep.  I think it has a lot to do with the indecision of finding out the gender that kept us on our hands and knees until the last minute.

When the time came to depart, we strapped our girl into her carseat and headed out the door.  As it turned out, our cushion time for traffic was unnecessary and we arrived at the hospital 45 minutes before our appointment.  So, we made a little detour to a nearby Starbucks where I indulge myself with my usual hot drink, as I read that some caffeine will get baby moving a bit more for better visibility.  It turns out to be a bit too much because at certain points, the baby was moving way too much for the technician to capture the necessary images.

We arrived at the appointment on time, did the necessary administrative tasks, and was taken into a dark room where I took my seat front and center next to the high-tech machine and right in front of the flat screen TV that will display our baby for the next 30 minutes.  My dear husband and chatterbox toddler next to me.  The whole time our darling daughter said hi to her baby sibling, yelling "baby!"  In those moments, we were glad to have brought her along.

Baby looks perfect, measured perfectly with a little perfect heartbeat of 154, whatever that means but we were inform that that is where it is supposed to be.  We were assured that we have a perfect little person growing inside of me.  During it all, we asked our daughter to guess the sex of the baby by saying boy or girl, and every single time, she corrected us with "Noooo, baby!"  She is absolutely wise beyond her years because she is so right, boy or girl, it is our little baby, her little sibling, and we are a perfect family of soon to be four.

Without making the decision to find out the sex of the baby, the appointment was a bit lackluster.  We have the next five months to get ready for baby's arrival, spend as much time as we can with our first born, and with each other as husband and wife.  We originally thought we had a bit more time, but the measurements confirmed that we are a bit farther along than we originally thought and the due date was moved up by a few days, bringing the expected birthday that much closer to our first born's birthday.  Soon, we will have two August babies, two children, our girl will understand the trials and surprises of not being the only child. With that, we have five months to all get ourselves prepared, and I am realizing that there is no time long enough for that process.

 

toddler temper tantrums

It is quickly becoming apparent to us that we have a toddler on our hands.

Aside from our big weekend celebration of our anniversary, we decided to also go out to dinner on Wednesday, which is the actual date of our anniversary.  It was a family dinner, with a toddler in tow.  Well, less than an hour into dinner, when our entree had just arrived, our girl decided that everything on the table was too boring to entertain her anymore and squirm to get out of the table.  It would have all been okay since we were at Olive Garden, and they have generous space to cater to children, except that my girl wanted Mama to join her in the exploration.  After a few minutes of struggle, Joe and I looked at each other with knowing looks.  I walked with my child to keep her entertain while Joe call for the server to come and box our food and ask for the check.  That was the end of our third year anniversary celebration.

While waiting for Joe to get the check, I took Lia to the attached mall to walk around and get out some of that energy that is apparently pent up.  That didn't last too long since she decided then that her legs could not possibly walk another step, and forced me to pick her up to carry her.  Being almost 5 months pregnant, I must have looked like an idiot trying to juggle a 32 pound toddler.  A few steps in and I decided not to coddle her tantrums, so I put her down where in the middle of the mall, she threw a fit that called the attention of every passerby.  Thank goodness it was a weekday, and there was very little traffic in the mall.  I just stood there and let her work out her anger until her Joe arrived with our food, and we called it a night.

This is just one of the many examples of tantrums that she throws these days when she does not get what she wants.  But not all is lost, she and Joe was so cute earlier during dinner when it was all well.

 

A gorgeous anniversary surprise awaiting me at my desk at work after returning from a meeting. 

Week 76: Your natural hair color will always be the best color ever made.

I wish I had learned this lesson earlier in life before experimenting with bleaching, bright red hair and blonde.  When grey began to make its appearance, I find myself trying to replicate what was once a natural color. 

You are a brunette, with a gorgeous set of colored mane that is uniquely found from a mix of curly Irish blonde and straight black Asian hair.  It is perfection when combined with your milky flawless skin. 

While I don't want to emphasize beauty solely through external features, realize that what you are born with is already the utmost form of beauty that you can achieve.

3 year anniversary: choices and investments

We celebrated our third year anniversary with a fancy steak dinner and a movie four days before the actual date.  We came home late rolling in at exactly 11:37pm to our sleeping girl.  On the ride home we asked rhetorical questions of each other like "my gosh, when was the last time we stayed out this late."  It has definitely been a while. 

On Saturday, I got dolled up, or at least tried to make an extra effort of the usual look, with curled hair, extra-care make up and clothes that flatter a 16 week baby bump.  I felt good and my husband thinks I look good.  Win-win.  We spritz on our signature scents, and headed out the door feeling extra giddy about the night ahead.  We held hands on the short drive to the restaurant, took care to smile more, gazed a little longer at each other, and just doing things like we used to do when we first started this relationship five years ago.  

We arrived at the fancy restaurant to people in fancy clothes that greet, seat and serve in suits.  We ordered steaks that cost more than a week's worth of meals, and when the fries arrived, we pretended that it was good enough to not be dipped in ketchup, so we didn't ask for any.  We paid for a meal we couldn't afford, and walked outta there feeling like we appropriately gave the special occasion its due attention with the fancy meal, but was glad to return to our true selves who could really use some ketchup with those fries.

We headed to the local movie theater to catch "The Vows."  A good cry and some hand-holding later, we called it a night and returned to our little girl who is fast asleep.  Five hours of adult time and two hundred and fifty dollars later, we went to bed happy and full on love.

On this typically non-momentous three year anniversary of our marriage, we celebrated without fuss and musts.  No presents were exchanged.  No big anniversary trip planned.  It's another day for two very simple people who love deeply, who nurture, who grow. 

I think about how far we have come so far.  The past three years seems like it had passed in a blink, and yet a toddler and another pregnancy proved that it was momentous time.  We did a lot for each other.  We supported one another through the rough times, taking on each other's individual challenges as our own and came out of the other side better individuals and an even greater couple.  

In keeping with the message that The Vow appropriately delivers, I don't ever want to forget how special this once-in-a-lifetime love is.  In the time and age where divorce is high, we believe we have a fighting chance at making it last a lifetime, because we live within the means of our choices, and I truly believe that we will always choose each other above all else.  I write and I document, constantly, because I don't ever want to one day forget that while our love is simple, it is nevertheless grand.  Unlike the movie where there was a dramatic impact that take away a memory, life and its mundane happenstances have a way of making us forget the important things, and I want to be reminded of exactly how I feel on this day, when we celebrate our third year anniversary and the abundant blessings that are found in the company of a lover and the kids that we created.  Because of these and more, I will always choose to invest in us. 

May we always choose and invest in each other, for a lifetime more.

a beach and a zoo, in winter

Gosh, Northern California was blessed with beautiful weather this past weekend, reaching as high as 80 degrees.  Having been plague with rain (although it is much needed in this part of the world) just days before, the anticipated beautiful weather kick me into high gear to plan for some much needed fun in the sun to take me out of this winter gloom.

My girl also welcome the change of pace very much.  Changing our long sleeves for bathing suits and the indoor for the outdoor was literally a breath of fresh air in the midst of winter, even if it is in Northern CA where winter doesn't really exist.  On Saturday, we headed to the beach.

Typically, we don't visit the beach without a lot more company, but the last minute weather shift doesn't allow for a lot of people to make changes to their plan.  At one point, we even debated to stay in town for lack of company, but once we hit the road to make that 45 min drive, Joe and I always discuss why we don't do this more often, even if it's just in the company of a husband and wife, and their toddler.  We went all out and packed everything, from snacks, to beach toys, to umbrellas and towels, to the wagon with wheels made for the sand.  We mean business when we do this.  It always prove to be a blast when we take the time to put in the effort, even though it did take an hour to get ready and head out the door.  You can bet that we will be doing this more often, and this is just a glimpse into the summer days.

These are the things that make my heart happy, and they are free...

Building castle in the sand.

Dad spent an insane amount of time to build the castle to just be knocked off within 2 seconds, but oh so worth the effort.

Capturing the bump.

15 weeks baby bump - the awkward stage of the first sign of a bump vs. a lost battle to the donut box.

A walk on the beach with our loved ones.

Having the first taste of sand, and finding out that it does not taste good. One moment, she was playing with it, the next, she scooped it into her mouth and laughed.

Ate sand and finding out that it tastes no good.

On Sunday, we headed north in the opposite direction from the beach, also a 45 min drive, to go to the Oakland Zoo.  We have a friend that lives in that area, and hold season pass to the zoo and happened to have free admission tickets.  We use any excuse to visit friends and plan a fun-filled day out of our fleeting weekend days.  Thankfully, Joe and I are always on the same page when it comes to these kind of impromptu little trips.  We are always down to have a family day...

The zoo proved to be much more fun than I anticipated.  Since Lia is at the age of learning animals and the sounds they make, seeing them in the flesh and having her practice her words makes this mama beamed with pride.

Her favorite animals were the elephants and it is one of the words that I love hearing her say.  It almost sounds like "elfant."  But what surprises me the most was when we saw the monkey.  This is the one animal that she has not mastered yet, and the only monkey that she knows of is Boots from Dora.  But as soon as she saw the monkey, she began to make monkey sounds, which is absolutely hilarious.  I didn't even know she knows monkeys let alone the sounds they make.  She manage to surprise us every single day, and this day was no different.

Her face lights up with delight as she knows she's entertaining us imitating monkey sounds.

The only downfall to the day was that my pregnant self cannot handle the heat and the hills, and I was exhausted and was definitely waddling even at 15 weeks, and I didn't even care.  My poor husband had to carry his 30+ pound toddler around the whole time as she refused to stay in the stroller because of all the stimulation at the zoo. 

Once we were done, we headed to the nearby marina to have an early dinner.  The food was delicious, the company was wonderful, and the view breathtaking.  As always, the weekend ends just much too quickly, and next thing we knew we were settling into bed getting ready to tackle the work week ahead.  While there is no promises of great weather in the upcoming weeks, this weekend definitely reminded us what fun can be had when we have great company, big and small, great weather, and very little money, within our own little town.  Spring and summer, I am so ready for you!

Dear friends.  Great company always makes for a great time.

Week 75: You are a perishable item.

Throughout my adult years, I have thrown out a lot of good foods, and money in the process, because my intention of making dinner with those perishable goods always get pushed out until tomorrow.  Next thing I know, most of those things end up in the trash because I waited far too long.

Remembering that we are all perishable items will allow you to live accordingly before we expire.